There may come a time in life where you want to settle down.  There may even come a time in life where you need to settle down.  However, there is just one problem – timing.  So many times in life a relationship is not available when you are available.  When you think it is the right time for you, it turns out to be the worst time for you.  Perhaps you don’t have someone to go out to the movies with, or go out to dinner with – simple things like that.  If this sounds like you, then let me just say that you don’t need a relationship; you just need a date.  However, if you want someone to be there for you, and you want to be there for them – then that’s a totally different story!  When the right time comes for you to settle down, let’s make sure that we haven’t started a ticking bomb.  Keep reading.

I have a confession to make.  This confession is by far the MOST shocking revelation ever, but I have to be honest!  Well, here goes…the confession is….I’m not perfect.  And here’s something that maybe even more shocking…neither are you.  A lot of times it’s the “perfection” that prevents us from being happy in our relationships.  When you stop and think about it, there are a lot of dynamics that make up a successful relationship.  For example, just because you like him, doesn’t mean he is going to like you – not to mention that there’s the physical, emotional, and overall appeal aspects that make up the chemistry and romantic connection you are striving for.  So, as you can see the list could go on and on.  It all adds up to one simple question…what do you want?

This one little question stops so many people from finding a true relationship in their life.  The fact is, a lot of people simply do not know what they want.  Or even worse, they want what someone else has suggested they should want.  The DCP says that you are the only one that should be running your life.  No one else has the intuition or right to decide who’s a good match for you.  So, back to the question….what do you want?  What do you want her to look like?  What do you want him to look like?  How tall would you like him to be?  How short should she be?  What color are her eyes?  The point I’m trying to make here is that if you get caught up on perfection, you will be searching for a long time…maybe even forever (and a day).  The DCP says to reject perfection…focus on being happy.  After all, that’s what it’s about right?  Think about this – even seemingly perfect couples have problems and break up.  Do you know why?  It is because they are not happy!  You will discover that the emotion of happiness is ready to explode if your relationship timer is set on perfection.

The DCP says that if you want a worth-while relationship to last the test of time, you will need to stop the search for perfection and start searching for the CD’s (Core Desires).  We need to focus on CD’s!  CD’s are the desires that you absolutely must have in order to be happy in your relationship.  Some people will have more CD’s than others, and some people will have less.  CD’s can be ANYTHING you want, but not EVERYTHING you want.  They can range from anything such as a strong spiritual life or a more materialistic lifestyle. CD’s are not one size fits all and it varies from person to person.  It must be said that CD’s are not needed for you and your significant other to “get” together, but rest assured…CD’s are absolutely mandatory if you want to “stay” together!  Don’t kid yourself when it comes to this concept.  A lot of things happen in relationships, but the CD’s are the only anchor you will have when your relationship is being tossed and turned in the perfect storm of love.

Another timer that is set on relationships is when a person simply wants a relationship to fill a void in their life.  The void could be loneliness, money, self-esteem, baby-daddy, etc.  This is one of the worse platforms when diving into a relationship.  Do you know why?  It’s because it makes you more vulnerable to major relationship problems as time progresses.  The DCP says that we should all start new relationships by being a slightly better person than when we ended the last.  The truth is…there are three sides to every story, and even if you ended up with a loser, you need to focus your attention on your actions (only).  Ask yourself the question, why did I end up with a loser in the first place?  It could very well be because of the loneliness Time Bomb!  If you believe that God is going to send someone to you, then you need to put faith in action and get yourself ready to receive that blessing!  No one can do that for you – it is your responsibility.

Even though God may bless you with a good relationship, you still need to take responsibility for your actions.  You still need to stay mindful of what attracts that other person to you and what compels you to continuously fall in love with them.  For my unmarried friends out there, I want you to know that when you get married or get in a relationship that every day is not going to be Sunny.  Conversely, everyday is not going to be Rainy.  Some days, you’re going to get Snow, some days you will get Sleet, and some days simply put…you will get Hail (that’s a joke)!   Be prepared for the elements by making sure you go through the storm with the right person!

Most people will tell you that a relationship happens when you least expect it.  Well, The DCP says that a relationship happens when you most expect it!  There is nothing wrong with expecting to be in a relationship.  Listen to what I’m saying (rather, read what I’m writing) – your thoughts control your life.  If you are so busy focusing on your life, you stand the chance of NEVER having a life with someone else.  The key here is to focus on your life and do things that are good for you, but don’t rule out the possibility of sharing your life with someone else…because when you are able to share two complete lives – that’s when two…will truly become one!

-Remember, time is going to pass regardless of who you end up falling in love with.  The DCP says…just be sure that ticking sound you hear is from your wristwatch and not from your relationship.

~Be Inspired and Live You!

Coach Dwayne

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